God’s Heart…

James 1:27 (New International Version)

²⁷Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world.

A long time ago I prayed that God would break my heart with the things that break the heart of God.  Thankfully in His wisdom I don’t believe He’s answered that prayer fully.  I don’t know any human aside from Jesus could handle that level of heartbreak.  The level of heartbreak He has revealed to me I’m praying He will take and turn it into action.

I made the decision to adopt Madalynn out of a desire to become a Mom.  I’ve always had a Mom’s heart, and couldn’t imagine living my life without hearing someone call me that.  I wrestled for quite awhile with whether or not it was selfish to bring a child into a single parent home.   In the end I reconciled that with the family Madalynn would become a part of.  It goes beyond me… by adopting her she got a Mom, grandparents, aunts, uncles & cousins, and lots of extended family, and friends.

Another thing I’ve had to reconcile is that I wasn’t motivated to adopt her to ‘save’ an orphan.  I don’t see it that way… I see it as becoming a Mom.  I cringe at comments like “She’s so lucky”.  First of all I don’t believe in luck I believe God had a plan to make me her mother, and her my daughter.  Why is that comment so common to adoptive parents, and yet something you would never say to biological parents?  She’s just my daughter.

However, I can’t escape the fact that had she stayed in Guatemala her life would be very different.  I’m not speaking materially either, as material items are fleeting. 

I wonder would she be in an orphanage, would she be on the street somewhere, or even worse.  None are scenarios I can let linger in my mind.

Because I have this amazing living, breathing vibrant little girl who has taken over my heart I can’t let go of the thoughts for all the others left in Guatemala, and around the world.  God calls us to live out our faith by caring for the least of these.  I can’t get them out of my heart or my head.

God has fanned the fire on the passion that has been in my heart my entire life.

"Once our eyes are opened, we can't pretend we don't know what to do. God, who weighs our hearts and keeps our souls, know that we know, and holds us responsible to act." Proverbs 24:12

God has been stirring this in my heart for a long time… years probably.  I’m just not sure what it’s going to look like or how it will be translated.  Part of what God has been doing in me in preparation is to remove fear, and give me a desire for persistence.  I was inspired when I read recently about Thomas Edison, his teacher said he was "Too stupid to learn anything"... he was fired from 2 jobs for being "unproductive"... he failed at inventing the lightbulb 10,000 times!! When asked how it felt to fail 10,000 times Edision replied "I didn't fail 10,000 times. The lightbulb was an invention with 10,000 steps"... Maybe what God is calling me to will require 10,000 steps or even more, but I won’t get anywhere if I don’t take the first one.

The plight of orphans in our world is so overwhelming…143 million worldwide.  The number is so staggering what can one person do?  I’m not sure but I know I have to do something.  I’ve started with prayer… we’ll see where it goes from here…

Steven Curtis Chapman song “What Now?”

I saw the face of Jesus in a little orphan girl
She was standing in the corner on the other side of the world
And I heard the voice of Jesus gently whisper to my heart
Didn't you say you wanted to find me?
Well here I am, here you are

And I saw the face of Jesus down on Sixteenth Avenue
He was sleeping in an old car, while his mom went looking for food
And I heard the voice of Jesus gently whisper to my soul
Didn't you say you wanted to know me?
Well here I am, and it's getting cold

So, What now?
What will you do now that you found Me?
What now?
What will you do with this treasure you've found?
I know I may not look like what you expected
But if you remember this is right where I said I would be
You've found me